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I should have stayed home and made copys |
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Simply Amusing |
by Susan Sherbert | |||
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Dear Diary, What was I thinking! I should have known better. Wasn't all the pain and suffering I experienced the last time, enough to make me want to give it up forever? But no, I had to give in to temptation. And what makes me so mad is how easily I gave in. I should have stood up to my friends and said "NO" then I wouldn't be experiencing all the pain I am feeling right now. When am I ever going to learn? It started out all so innocently. Oh, come on, take a day off from A & S Printing & Copy and join us. You'll have a great time. Everyone will be there. You have to come. A day of fun with family and friends sounded tempting but I still have vivid memories of the last time. It was brutal and I suffered for days. Why on earth would I want to go through that again? Hummm. Maybe it wasn't really that bad and why does it have to be all or nothing anyway? I could just go and watch couldn't I. Or better yet, I could go if I promise myself that I will stay with the responsible ones in the group. Yeah, that would work. I'll be all right. I'll just sit back, stay out of trouble, and watch the other idiots make fools of themselves. It's amazing how things never work out as planned. We were up early and ready to go but as usual people were late, and tempers were high so the group decided to split up. And guess where I ended up? Yep, you guessed it. Right in the middle of the ones I promised myself I'd stay away from. But it's no problem. I'm strong. I can handle it. I won't give in to temptation. And then it happened. I stood there frozen in a moment of indecision with everyone staring at me. I could feel the pressure all around. Should I or shouldn't I. I swallowed hard and quietly said, "a snowboard please." There you have it! I caved in. I promised myself that I would have a nice easy day of skiing with dad and play it safe. Snowboarding is a brutal sport and I have a business to run, you know. Plus no matter how I deny it - I'm not getting any younger. But there I sat being fitted for snowboard boots instead of skis. But it will be okay, I had done this once, three years ago, and I survived didn't I. So what if I couldn't move a muscle for a week afterwards. This time I'll wear wrist guards, a nice thick helmet, and stay on the bunny slopes. Again, things never go as planned. Come on Susan let's go, we're heading to lift number five. Like a little baby lamb unsteady on its feet, I followed wobbling all the way. I can do this. I can do this. Just get on the lift and hold on. Wow this is beautiful, I forgot how peaceful and quite the ski lift can be. Up and up we went and the view was absolutely beautiful at the top. Then I had to get off the lift and it was all down hill from there. In case some of you are not acquainted with snowboarding, let me explain something to you. The idiot who created the sport made it so that you have no access to poles to help you balance. Then the darn thing is designed to stay attached to your feet. That means when you fall, (and as a beginner you fall a lot, let me tell you) both feet are still strapped to this big awkward board. Somehow, as you sit there with your butt on the snow, you are expected to haul your tired old body into an upright position, with two feet stuck side by side on a board that is willing and ready to slide down the hill at a moments notice - all of this remember, without the assistance of poles. You try pushing yourself up a hundred times a day in a full ski suit with wrist guards, glasses and a helmet. And I was wondering why my arms were so sore the next day. Duh! In the end it all turned out okay. I made it back to A & S Printing & Copy the next day and I was only sore for about three days this time. Next time I'm definitely skiing - yet maybe if I took a lesson... CORNY JOKES Why did the little boy insist on bringing his truck to ski school? Because the instructor said they were going to learn to snow plow What should you do if you see a skier hitch hiking? Give him a lift What do you call a very light dusting of snow? Baby powder How can they tell that skiing is more popular than snowboarding? By looking at the poles (surveys) |
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